Music is one of the most powerful forms of communication that there is available in this world. It can be used to take the listener to a place where they are able to connect with someone that they didn’t even know existed and show them that they feel and understand them. This post isn’t about club music or fun music, this post is about emotional music, music which moves you to tears, moves your very heart and soul to a place where you feel completely at peace, or in cases where you just feel all of your vulnerabilities just pour out and lay themselves out in front of you and for you and the world to look at.
I just listened to My Immortal by Evanescence, which was released in 2009. I have heard this song before and I thought it was a lovely song then, but not something I gave a second thought at the time. Listening to it today the song took a whole new meaning to me and moved me to have a lump in my throat. Thinking back I can understand why I didn’t really feel that way about the song then, I was fairly angry throughout that year around the time it came out and I had not reached the level of emotional maturity that I have now. This song is utterly beautiful. The words resonate within me, the music behind the vocals carry me and the vocals themselves, well they simply leave me speechless and in awe. Her control of her voice to give that vulnerability, when I know there is so much power behind it from other tracks, and that haunting sorrow which I feel from this piece is just so emotional I feel…I can’t even describe how I feel, it’s this sad yet happy feeling, completely exposed to my emotions like a raw nerve.
Music like this I don’t really listen to as much because I try to hide away from alot of what I am feeling at times, compartmentalise and store in a box in the back of my brain to gather dust and forget I ever felt like that. In reality that is not healthy or the right way to deal with those things in my life. It may be appropriate to just put them away for a while until the correct time to deal with them has come, but all emotions should be dealt with and sorted so that they can be moved past. That is something I have learnt as I have grown older because suppression only leads to a build up of pressure inside you, and when that valve bursts you have a breakdown, and those are so much worse than dealing with the problems day by day and getting it out of your system, piece by piece.
This post is truly lives up to the name my mental stream. I have not read it back or edited it in any way at all, I have just poured out my heart and emotions into this piece and I hope it is legible and easy to understand for you Internet. Not that anyone will actually be reading this but wow it feels like you understand exactly what is going on in my head and my heart. Thanks for listening to me Miss Internet, you are a great girl.